Friday, December 12, 2008

Memorex

Once these kids I was in college with (yes, we were kids, and we finally admit it) decided to celebrate the independence of the United States (I believe William Jefferson Clinton was the president — like I said, we were quite young and didn't know about all the borrowing from China yet) by shooting bottle rockets and such in a parking lot of the apartments where we lived.

The three four-plexes were made of wooden green-encrusted shingles and flooded if one lived on the south side where the hill was. There was a creek below, and "Moss Creek" represents some of my happiest moments. I think I was 21 to 23. Without looking it up, I am not sure.

A highlight of the evening, aside from the angry non-friend resident who came out declaring we should desist because she had a bunch of fireworks in her car's trunk (I know, it still makes me laugh, makes me think of that news story in which the person blew up the house because he turned on an oven without checking — who checks? Yes, of course, I do, always — to see whether it was empty. And, yes, who stores fireworks in the oven), was when the boys took a big cardboard-backed poster of the Memorex Man, propped him on the roof and fired away.

Never mind that they were shooting at their own home.  Unfortunately, we did not have digital cameras then.

Fortunately, my paranoia did not pan out, and all was well. I don't think anyone even got burned, despite the fact that at the "end" of the night, the envelope-pushing took the form of taking random paper bags of Chinese gunpowder products, lighting them on fire on the ground and seeing which way things would shoot out at our feet.

That's how you know you have overbought.

A short while ago, I was trying to recall whether a certain dream I had happened on Tuesday night (Wednesday morning) or some other time.

I did not blog it, journal it, nor inform the subject via e-mail of what my subconscious seems to be up to. The scriptwriters on Numbers tonight had one of the characters say that our psyches play things out so that we don't have to in real life. That explanation doesn't do much for me.

I don't like not to remember things.  I'm not 80 nor 60 nor even yet 40.

My memory has essentially be transfered to cyberspace. I joke to those I interview (even unofficially; you are all always on the record) that I don't remember anything that is not written down. I have grown fully into my "photographic memory" in that I can't recall anything I am not immediately reading.

We do have terribly much to manage these days.*

But still.

It troubles me that I can't recall basic personal cycles, hours of work, times of medication, amounts of experience – without a written record. Most of the records are virtual. They are tied to the calendar mapped on my computer's hard drive, they are logged in the list of the e-mails I have sent, and they are typed up into items such as this, which I do not own, which I would not have access to in most earth-zones nor which is at all private (is not immune to data-mining).

Anytime I recall anything factual, I can only see its written record in my mind's eye.

There are obvious pitfalls to storing data in such a way that requires a special (and ever-becoming-obsolete) tool for its access.  I have an IBM PS notebook computer from the 1990s full of things that are getting more and more difficult to retrieve or transfer.  Books and paper notebooks are heavy.  Books can be burned, but they can come in handy in ways a Kindle cannot.  (Fire — staying warm and cooking — is important, for example, but books can't be eliminated in one fell technological swoop the way le Grid could.)

Case in point:  A free e-mail address I used to use abruptly turned into a pay-site one day, and all the saved mails, including ones I felt were valuable and genuine reactions about 9/11 from friends and strangers, were suddenly and irretreivably gone. It was like a fire. Like dealing with a fire, I had no choice but to let it go. Gone.  In practice, that's what I'm doing with all the texts on the old laptop, too.  Its disk drive is dead; the ports have outdated pin-configs, there is, naturally, no USB, no firewire.

And as someone who drags around a MacBook all the time in public and knows anyone could steal it or that I could somehow accidentally get hit by a bus and become one with the thing, I certainly don't do a lot of backing up to the external harddrive.  But even that is somewhat useless, you know. 

I wrote on the last page of a college exam today that "someone needs to learn some dates."  It was sad not to be able to visualize what I needed.  I'm sure some was due to having had only a few hours of sleep, to studying after a full day of tedious work-tasks, to not having (providing) an additional hour – but I also know that I rarely store anything in my real brain anymore.

It's a fallow place where I'm waiting for impetus to plant anything.  I still water what's there, but I see the desert advancing and know that it's just easier for now to store grain in RAM-jars.

Ask me about "who was in that movie," "who is that artist," "what did that politician say," or even the simplest damn thing like "what's the exact wording of the First Amendment," and I will ask the Internet.  Sometimes, I will search in one of the several hundred books in the other room, but usually, yes, I'm at a loss in public without something like an iPhone.  (I do not have any G3 machines.)  I used to know things.  I used to have time to learn things.

I know some of you out there will have your own semi-informed theories about my brain.  Yes, whatever, go ahead.  I still say that there's too much to keep track of.  After all, I do have over 100 draft e-mails awaiting completion or sitting there saying, "hey, I'm an action-item, act on me," 500 in the inbox, 1,000s of articles, press releases, and images to keep simultaneously at the forefront.  And that's just the employment-related part.  There are three other e-mail addresses (at least), 30,000 other ideas I'm looking for the time to use.  And school.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Fear of the known

I always said that I'm much more wary of the white men out there than the "scary black guys" who wander about.

I could have chosen to be kidnapped today, but I declined the ride offered me by the middle-aged and well-groomed white guy in the nice, clean, white SUV who thought I was pitiful, I suppose, being a white woman walking in December, oh no.

As if, I told the fellow pedestrian who witnessed it and who laughed at the idiocy too, I'm going to get into his car.

When I say "offered," I mean turned and started driving the wrong way on a one-way street to call out something and then nod, wide-eyed and pointing in the direction we were heading; and when I say "declined," I mean I looked at him like he was crazy to think I was so stupid, scowled, shook my head and mouthed a very bitchy, "No!"

This is the kind of thing you get when you let your hair down, by the way.

(So, when I say that I'll "do anything" for money, now you know that I'm lying : )

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

There he is


Mr. America … I mean, "Mr. Cat" (what a stupid name). He used to be Milo, apparently. Can you believe he is only 4 pounds overweight? That's what his last vet report reports. I suppose, if anyone cared to do the math, that 4 to 17 is a ratio somewhat like 60 to 225.

Very American.

But he's handsome, isn't he?  He's about 12 or 13, like Katrina.

The birds that did not react to tiny, heavy-footed Katrina freak out when "giant racoon-shaped silent beast" slinks by.

He's scared of everything.  Has not really eaten in a day.  Seems to be adjusting.  His shape is due to having lived in a nursing home for several years.  Three nursing homes, in fact.  His bed-fellow (woman) died two months ago.  He is easily agitated and growls and hisses, but he is too lazy or nice to do much about it.  I don't push it. 

He is living with us because of a 9-month-old poodle and the Internet.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Monday, December 01, 2008

Went

Museum. Yes. Could only answer the idea / question of satyr's anatomy by using mirror and own (marble) body.

Wedding. Yes. Stayed up until 3 a.m., as with all weddings these days.

Darn.

And then there's Pakistan et al.

Paper due in 30 or so hours. Extreme jealousy of those on planes across Atlantic last few days hinders.

Know of three.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Hot all night

Cold all day.
She is supposed to be at the museum taking notes.
They have to dress up and go to a wedding reception.
Snow is falling.
Need more clothes.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Too lazy to photograph the pie

And you know what pies look like. There is nothing special about this one, except that it lacks ginger and has compensating cloves. My fingers touched the crust-dough, of course. We are all used to consuming skin cells. We breathe them all the time. Dust motes nothing.

I must be the most under-informed voter of all time.

(Since you know I watched all the debates, did a bunch of fact-checking and article-reading … even heard plenty 'o other side on the radio, you know that's irony and such.) Still there are always surprises.

Last night, we flipped by Barbara Walter's interview with Barack Obama, and I was surprised (but not that surprised) to learn that he is a smoker.

"Ohmigod! Obama smokes?!?!"

I always wished I liked cigarettes and then am always happy I do not have to worry about their health-effects — they seem so wonderful in the movies and then they stink so terribly and make me feel nauseous and wheezy. I avoid bars and other venues where people smoke. I cringe when I see people younger than I am smoking … in other words, smoking is gross, and I hate smokers.

Knowing Obama smokes would not have changed my vote.

It actually makes him seem even cooler.

And then he will be ever cooler when he quits. Except it's probably fine to have a relatively non-destructive vice; drinking and other things make your brain fuzzy; and philandering and gambling just waste time and family.

I will presume that no one has actually smoked in the White House for some time now.

Can't you just picture Obama coming out at 8 p.m. and having a smoke while looking out on the back lawns towards the security fence?

I can also picture one of those famous posters of him but transformed with him taking a drag and squinting like the Marlboro Man.

One last thing: if Barack smokes, I totally want to know what witchcraft he's using on those crazy-white teeth of his every night.

Silly games with pages

(Called a meme) from Fate's Thoughts:

Mr. Quincy P. Morris found me alone.

— Bram Stoker, Dracula, 1897

"From planet gnome:

Grab the nearest book.
Open it to page 56.
Find the fifth [full] sentence.
Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST"

mine:

He seemed to be taking refuge in some other time, while his father and the gypsy with shouts interrupted the predictions of Nostradamus amidst a noise of flasks and trays and the disaster of spilled acids and silver bromide that was lost in the twists and turns it gave every instant.

— Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude, 1967; English trans. 1970

I know the instructions do not say whether it is the fifth sentence overall or fifth complete one; I presume complete.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Pressing buttons

La la la, the Web site said "unable to process your request online," and it gave me an 800-number; of course, calling that brought me to the wrong sector of their financial empire, so I was transferred (and given the number printed on the statement, yes, I have that, yes, it's by the Web address that hands out the other number) and then entered loan number and such again but got over-confident and decided to try the online method once more just in case (to avoid talking to another person), and I hung up before it told me indeed it was still unable to process.

So, I call the 866-number, enter all my information again and endure the "would you like to take a brief customer survey" (the kind that calls you back in 15 minutes after you finish with the customer service representative — no, thank you) delay and finally get whomever, who asks for my name and something else before telling me to please call back in an hour as they are having trouble with their computer system and can't access anything.

A quick message at the beginning of the experience would have been appreciated.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Shuffle inside

Stop all this weeping, swallow your pride;
You will not die, it's not poison.

le Travail

This list.
In my head.
Stayed all week.
Taking up residence.
Waiting for evacuation.
The trucks are not here.
Boats have been moored.
Airspace closed.
Blue bottle bangs its head.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Cop-out


Productivity.

I think it's funny that speeches in political battles cite our workers as the hardest-working in the world.  Well, I guess the French way proved to be noncompetitive.  But, of course, the Japanese work a ton.  Can  you find anything more recent than this:  my goodness, of course, the Chinese people work their asses off.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

4-5-1994

No one knows what this means anymore:

12/12
1) These are the first eight lines of a Shakespearian sonnet, which serve to ridicule Petrarchan norms of conceit by contradicting them. Shakespeare's sonnets generally tended to be more progressive than either those of Sidney or Spenser, embracing a wider range of emotions beyond pure praise and love. Although this sonnet does address itself to praising a lady, it does so in an obvious irony - it tells all the things this lady is not.

And this is quite circuitous:

12/12
2)
This passage takes place in Enrour's Den of Spenser's "The Faerie Queen" and describes evil Enrour when she had finally gotten a strong hold around the Red Cross Knight. He came to this cave out of curiosity and because of his pride, did not listen to Una's warnings to avoid it. "God help the man" is exactly what Spenser makes to happen: the quote in the second stanza comes from Una, who is faith and unity, representing how God's grace can save man from the evils he falls into when he sins.

Gag!:

12/12
3) In Marlowe's "Dr. Faustus," the central idea is the conflict between faith and reason. Faustus himself was a scientist-turned-magician, who sought to gain power using supernatural forces Marlowe reserves for God's use. This particular scene occurs about three-quarters of the way through the play and gives this conflict names and voices. The evil angel and Lucifer mean to convince Faustus that his contract is binding and that since he has turned away from God, he cannot, of course, be saved. However, Faustus does not see (as the Good Angel tries to explain) that this logical arguement [sic] does not apply — Christ is ever-merciful and can save the repentant man if he is asked to.

********

There are six more pages of this, two 12-point questions and two 30-point ones.  My goodness.  This is the person who eschewed in fear the GRE subject test.  Indeed.  And once had a lover who got a doctorate of poetry.  He wanted children.  Even a decade's-worth of attraction and dance can't change that difference.

Subjects in rest of "blue book" include:  Ptolemaic cosmology, metaphysical conceit, transformation and exchange of viewpoints in "A Mid-Summer Night's Dream," and Milton's portrayal of Satan as non-heroic (an argument against the Romantics).


More Wharton

It was usual for ladies who received in the evening to wear what were called "simple dinner-dresses"; a close-fitting armor of whale-boned silk, slightly open in the neck, with lace ruffles filling in the crack, and tight sleeves with a flounce uncovering just enough wrist to show an Etruscan gold bracelet or a velvet band. But Madame Olenska, heedless of tradition, was attired in a long robe of red velvet bordered about the chin and down the front with glossy black fur.

Can't Bring

Portage, what one does with a canoe or other watercraft at points where the water's depth or flow becomes inadequate.

If you could have one book on that deserted island, what would you bring?

In the drifty river of what we characterize as the economy*, I can't bring myself to finish that IRS application (for jobs in February, due by the end of the year) nor to press "interested" at change.gov (I can't move to D.C., of course, unlike Carol Kennicott).

Main Street is not the book I would take along. I grew very tired of hearing about Wall Street versus Main Street during ye olde election. Enough with the street-talk; the world is plunging along with layoffs, we get it. Even if I did have a sense of what market regulations were or could be — well, I just don't see any of us knowing enough about any of it to know what terms to use in a letter to one's elected officials that would have stopped it all.

Speaking of that, what does any first-time homebuyer know, anyway? I spent years relaying information about the process; I went to seminars and worked out charts. Lots o' logic goes out the window when one chooses a neighborhood, however. We did do that refinance last month, despite the credit crunch. I wanted it to help more, but something is better than nothing.

I think one of those tedious "how to survive such-and-such" books would be the thing to have if one could anticipate an existence like those folks on LOST.

Because, I almost have sections like this from Edith Wharton memorized:

She sang, of course, "M'ama!" and not "he loves me," since an unalterable and unquestioned law of the musical world required that the German text of French operas sung by Swedish artists should be translated into Italian for the clearer understanding of English-speaking audiences.



*It is all very vague to me without some sort of Japanese manga character acting as mascot; remember, I attended school in the USA, where finance and science seem not to exist — my liberal arts should have included economics, but the professor was reputedly a Keynesian who either yelled or dozed off; he was very old at any rate, and ranked as an emeritus, I believe … perhaps it was just the macro- portion of a two-part necessity.

Ergo, I did not take the class(es). I once took one summer semester and about three days of the second of Latin — so much for my attempt at brilliance John Milton-style. I did take an extra five hours of a laboratory science, botany, after biology and geology. You will note my avoidance of chemistry and physics. High school chemistry was fun enough, and though I was fascinated by how orderly and amazing the sub-level of life is and enjoyed playing in the lab, on paper, the mathematics of rings and reductions was too baffling.  I could not face that again.  Algebra in college was painful enough.

I could "totally stand" running through the English 2600 and 3200 books from freshman year (HS), which is sad, considering I had it all once like the back of my hand, the one thing that seemed transparent to me — that linguistics class was strange, science plus language plus random anthropology. I only remember being happy to know, if only for a second, a phonetic alphabet that can represent any sounds, transcribing accent, for example, along with this kind of über-diagraming of sentences we performed on a favorite author and on a work of our own. The professor told me I should write at least a page a day and end up with a book at the end of the year. Let me say that I share with a friend the inability to consider plot. We think in dialogue or, in my case, perhaps hers too, in visual step-by-step frames.

As you can see, there have been no books (on my part). I spent oodles of time reviewing others' writing; it is harder than it may sound, even without the grammar deficiency, for it takes time to uncover some people's points, conveyance of points, and their conception of facts. Brian Doyle, who edits Portland Magazine, wrote a great piece about the job. My favorite part begins, "there are hundreds of subtle joys and crimes of editing" and ends with the word "lunch." I was going to write to him and request permission to paste it all in here, but why bother a busy man.

Spending my brain on untangling prose I did not write, then writing prose I often would rather not write (just because of my sheer lack of personal writing moments — fiction, poetry, not to mention school work; we're off to analyze the anatomy and artistic choices dictating it in no fewer than six sculptures. Tomorrow may be the last day to return re-writes of the first paper. I have not decided.), leaves, as I said, little if no time for true creativity.  My writing sucks eggs!

And having a unique job situation — hopefully the truly only such situation of its kind anywhere, let's hope, dear me — puts one through a sort of foggy frozen abyss, you know, and one's life begins to take on the characteristics of a Choose Your Own Adventure book. Unlike those paperbacks that you could flip ahead in and know all outcomes before picking impulsively to "turn to page 23" and the Rubik's Cube with removable stickers, real life is non-cheatable. I hate guessing.

Look how complicated it all is!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Contrast cleaning


Hater


These are not the same mice (as each other).  They died in the same exact location four days apart.  There is another one (at least) still out there.  I hate them.  It's hard to hate the game and not the player(s).  If anyone has an owl I can borrow, I would appreciate it.  A black snake is also acceptable.  I hate killing things, so if I can "recycle" my rodents (who are practically living on air or are eating tree roots or something) I would feel better.  Help a mouse have a purpose!



Friday, November 14, 2008

Much nicer

Birdchick and her rabbit tales.

TMI Vanity Psi

Waking up, pillow feels like someone's been dozing mouth open; turn, same, turn. Neighbor's moped is heard: the unique thump of its being set on the driveway to the alley, and the unmistakable whiney thrumming of its efficient and polluting two-cycle engine. Walk to first floor, get drink of unsweetened lemon Kool-Aid. Touch face, find suspicious crustiness above lip. Good gracious, what has she been up to? Ascend and notice face is dripping blood.

Once in college, I woke up from a half-dream about wiping blood from the same side of my face — left, for the deficiencies of my right brain (also the smaller ______-side; not sure about best eye, etc.). That blood vessel was exposing itself from the tip of my nose. I read once in something like Seventeen or Sassy that picking blackheads on sensitive parts of the face can be detrimental … but I had done no such mutilating thing on that section, the outer rim that juts sweetly into space, of my nose. It was very hard to get it to heal decisively; I think I kept removing the "scab" because it was huge. Who knows. It was ages ago.

Likewise, the creepy little tubule, microscopic, in fact, but gigantic to me, of course, which this morning decided to rupture (or was scratched open while I slept), is in a location where no pimples ever inflame. I don't know why it appeared. Has it been there a year? I have wanted to slice it off, the visible capillary in its transparent and minimal layering of dermal cells, but I did not want the incessant bleeding. I'm not crazy. I've grown much more squeamish.

Sometimes, but not lately, mostly when I was young, I would take one of my disappointingly thin first fingernails and use it to remove white and irritated "taste buds." An incisor plane served as a cutting board. I hate the effect of certain foods; something acidic or unidentified, which is found in those round red-and-white peppermint candies, for example, always causes one of the papillae to enlarge and burn, itch and enrage. I can eat limes without a problem.

There is a mole on my shoulder that has offended me my whole life. The Japanese junior high school students even pointed it out once … my pet cockatiel has tried to chew it. At least I do not have those pouchy little flesh-portions around my eye that some people grow like tiny flaps or scales upon aging. (I looked up a tongue Web site, but it was so gross, I am not going to link to it; I did not find my condition, only a spelling confirmation; you've been subjected to enough!) It's too bad that cosmetic surgery (how these things would be classified by Health Care Incorporated) is expensive (and that I can't stand medical procedures of any kind).

I think the bleeding has been staved off for now. It is the brightest and most oxygenated blood, so I suppose, like all "nosebleeds," it is from an arterial path. I wonder if it would ever clot on its own. It will start up again when I take a shower. Oh, the provocative images. It must be Friday.

Here's some late-breaking spam:

From: survey@wal-mart-market.com
Subject: [QUAR] You Have Been Selected!
Date: November 14, 2008 7:11:47 AM CST

You have been selected to access the Walmart 2 Steps Survey and win a $150.00 gift certificate.

Please click here and complete the form to receive your reward. Thank you.

This is an automated message. Please don't reply. Message Id: 0019268154-wmrtsrv.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Need


No, not a cat. Not a shop window.
A nap. A neighbor who doesn't rev the scooter engine at 6:30 a.m.
A weather pattern that's quiet all night.
An immunity from hearing weird clicks and crashes in the lathe and plaster.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Erased

Holey moley

Barack has a lot of money.
A prime-time 30-minute infomercial on several major networks?
(T. the non-plumber didn't see that coming / was looking for junk food.)
Watched it all, of course / channels came in clearly.
Will be at FactCheck.org in morning …
Felt good at the time.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

B.H.O.


If you are not white, your citizenship is questioned.

I don't recall the United States people, government, or media questioning Christians here while Adolph Hitler, a professed Christian (Catholic-born), was expanding power through force and killing; of course, we did inter U.S. citizens of Japanese descent, and Hitler is to have said to have admired the armies of Muslim nations, supposedly confiding to a friend that that religion would have been more suited to "our purposes" than Christianity.

President Ronald Reagan was the one who signed the apology legislation that acknowledged racist motives toward the Japanese (despite the Supreme Court's having upheld in 1944 the Constitutionality of Executive Order 9066). There were even reparations, $1.6 billion.

Has anyone ever been inclined to add up the fees and penalties of all the lawsuit settlements the federal government is involved in?

No one ever made fun of Reagan's middle name — Wilson was a Democrat who started the Federal Reserve and oversaw the creation of the federal income tax. He did make sure all ships had enough lifeboats following the sinking of the Titanic.

Sure, being Robin Hood is not popular with everyone. But your income tax rate goes up the more you make already. I can never, ever use any child-related deductions, and we already pay the "self-employment" premium, despite also having two full-time employer-jobs, but it's not like anyone else has improved the situation.

I know we need more money for the wars and everything else. You can't have your cake and eat it too. It's time to pay up. Time to be less wasteful — remember those cartoons that depicted squirrels and other animals collecting tires, tin cans, and war bond donations? "Give, brother, give," and check out what you pitch in the landfill every day. (I'm one of those freaks all for the bottle-and-concrete homes). Yes, everything comes in a package, and it's hard to avoid. (Just think how big your house could be — I know I've thrown away a couple of mansions already.)

Everything we do is all complicated and consumeristic. If you're happy about that, let me know and let me know how to justify it; I am sick with compulsory wastefulness. An alternative is to wander off into the national forest and hope it stays that way long enough for you to starve or be eaten by a bear. Fun times!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Redistribution of Wealth 2.0

So, this man comes to the door at 12:11 a.m., knock knock.
In a nice overcoat, knock knock.
Silly us, we have the TV on, knock knock.
Go to door, you never know, knock knock.

Line: "I'm a minister; I'm from the church at the hospital"

Response (partial; loud): "Dude, I don't care who you are, look at what time it is."

Man goes, quickly, gets into silver two-seater's passenger side, leaves, does not ask any other neighbors for "shelter."

They say you shall not know Jesus when he comes / shall reject him. I know the Beatitudes, but my attitude is one of self-preservation.

(Last time a man came to here thusly, he was wearing childish clothes; by that I mean he had a sports jersey and cap and something like a pipe or bat.)

I mean, come ON, people!

(I'm up right now because the neighbor went off somewhere on her moped. You know how loud those are. I think she must have some kind of masochistic thing going; isn't it very cold outside right now? Or she's getting donuts and not bringing me any — she will be back around 8, I assure you, waking me up again; weird people have weird hours and jobs.)

Monday, October 27, 2008

CG goes to St. Louis (pronouce like woman at gallery; ie: the French way)








These are all buildings visible along Washington Avenue in St. Louis, Missouri. I need a wider-angle lens, but you get the idea … if you were in my head, you'd say, "Did I really go to scary-trendy bars alone / with my highschool friends on this street in the '90s? Everything looks so different. Darn, I really miss brick architecture and urban density more than I thought."




More autumnalness

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

My new job

BRANSON KICKS OFF CHRISTMAS WITH THE HOLIDAY PROMENADE OF STARS!
Ozark Mountain Christmas event is Saturday, November 1, at 10:00 a.m. at Branson Landing

The Holiday Promenade of Stars parade at the Branson Landing has a very special Grand Marshall again this year – “Mr. Christmas” Andy Williams. And later this year, Branson will be sharing that Grand Marshall with another parade, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in New York City.

The Holiday Promenade of Stars kicks off the 2008 festivities for Ozark Mountain Christmas on Saturday, Nov. 1 at 10:00 a.m. and will feature many of your favorite Branson stars, a marching band, dancers, acrobats, drummers and more. Even Santa himself joins in the fun as he makes his way to his very own Christmas Tree House in Town Square!

The parade begins promptly at 10:00 a.m. at the north end of Branson Landing by BELK Department Store. The Holiday Promenade of Stars moves along the thoroughfare until it arrives in Town Square. Local radio personalities, Steve and Janet, from Branson’s Hometown Radio KRZK 106.3, will host LIVE performances by Andy Williams, The Lennon Sisters, Bob Anderson, SIX, Jake Simpson, Jason Yeager, the cast of Country Tonite, and many other stars of music shows in Branson. As the promenade continues to move toward the Bass Pro Shops, a second performance area will be hosted by Bob Nichols, host and comedian with Country Tonite, and Gene Bicknell, owner of The Mansion and the Oak Ridge Boys Theatre. Don’t miss all the performances and appearances by Moe Bandy, The Platters and Liverpool Legends with the Starlite Theatre, Silver Dollar City, The Mansion and many more.

Join us at Branson Landing on Saturday morning, November 1st at 10:00 a.m., as we kick off, “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year" in Branson with the Holiday Promenade of Stars. Have a very Merry Christmas – in Branson!

All I Have

PALEOLITHIC 30000 - 10000
Chauvet cave, Vallon Pont d'Arc 30000 - 25000
Venus of Willendorf 28000 - 25000
Tuc d'Audoubert, Ariege 15000 - 10000
Altimira cave, Santander (Spain) 12000 - 11000

NEOLITHIC 9000 - 4000
Stonehenge 8000 - 2000
Çatal Hüyük 7200 - 6400

BRONZE AGE 3000 - 1000
Narmer Palette 3000
Cycladic sculptures 2700 - 2200

Old Kingdom 2700 - 2200
Djoser step pyramid complex, Saqqara 2630 - 2611
by Imhotep, 413 x 344 x 200; shafts 92; complex 193 x 100 x 33 wall

Pyramid of Cheops / Kufu, Giza 2551 - 2528 (1st and biggest of 3, incl. Menkaure, Khafre and Khafre Great Sphinx) by Hemiunu, 2.3 million blocks; 755 x 756 x 450

Chephren / Khafre 2500
Seated scribe 2500
Mycerinus / Menkaure and wife 2490 - 2472
Tomb of Ti, relief with cattle 2400 - 2300

Sumerian 3200 - 2200
White Temple / ziggurat 3200 - 3000
Standard of Ur, royal cemetery Tell Muqayyar, Iraq 2600
Naram-sin relief, Susa, Iran 2254 - 2218

Middle Kingdom 2040 - 1650
Sesostris III 2040 - 1650

New Kingdom 1550 - 1050
Hatshepsut mortuary temple by Senemut, Deir el-Bahri 1473 - 1458
with sanctuaries to Hathor, Anubis, H., Thutmosis I, Re-Horakhty, Amun
Hatshepsut offering jar kneeling statue 1473 - 1458
Paintings from Tomb of Nebamum, Thebes (dancers, cats) 1400 - 1350
Amarna Heresy, Akhenaton's rule (abandon Amen and Thebes) 1353 - 1335
Nefertiti, Tutankhamun funerary mask 1323
Temple Amen-Re, Karnak 1290 - 1224

Minoan 1700 - 1400
Palace at Knossos, labrynthian, tapering columns, frescoes, pipes, air wells, sliding doors
Harvester, Octopus vases
Destruction of Thera, 60 miles north of Crete 1628

HELLADIC 1600 - 1100 Tyrins, Mycenae (fortified, lion gate, narrowing, mountain)
Mask of "Agamemnon" 1600 - 1500 Mycenae grave circles
Helladic dagger (Minoan style, Helladic subjects)
Warrior crater 1200

Athens revival PROTOGEOMETRIC 1000 - 900

GEOMETRIC 900 - 700
Athens NM 804 740 Dipylon master
Hirschfeld krater 740

ARCHAIC 640- 480
Kouros 600
Anavysos 530
Ajax and Achilles krater by Exekias 540
Herekles and Antaias by Euphronios 510

CLASSICAL 480 - 330
Kritios / Thesius boy 480
Poseidon / Zeus from Artemision sea 460
Discobolus by Myron 460 (1 a.d. copies)
Riace bronze warrior 450
Doryphoros by Polykleitos 450 (1 a.d. copies) proportion, canon, study, chiastic balance
Stele of Hegeso, Dipylon cemetery 400
Knidians Aphrodite by Praxiteles 350 (copies)

Monday, October 20, 2008

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Just heard someone scream

Drunk and happy scream?
Never saw that before / need help scream?
Angry at known-party scream?

I can not evaluate nor will investigate.

I heard perhaps a gun.

I hear definitely helicopter.

I think all are unrelated.

Thinking is what got us here in the first place.

Let me rant happily that Dr. Robert Cohon is a dedicated teacher.

(We had a review tonight, during cocktail hour, Simpsons — new episode; no functioning recording device here! and no, I don't have the patience to watch "TV" online after the fact, legal or illegal — and I did only learn a few hints as to what one should express on the midterm in two days; however, I am the 10-years-ago undergrad / post-bac / older student (but not the oldest in the room) and so know the game, remember the game, love the game, hate the game, wish I had more time for the game, which I abandoned over a decade ago because I hate games, because I feel as I felt that intellectual games were on their own plane … )

I shall not go on there.

What I mean is: when I watch PBS and see folks spending full days setting up cameras (infra-red / new technology for which I have no name / time to reresearch and confirm) with the goal of seeing forest animals elusive like Sumatran tigers and elephants, I feel at once jealous and sad.

I also envy those who spend hours under the Turkish sun excavating new spaces that show that people there built Stonehedges thousands of years prior to the Paleolithic Age in Beowulf-land.

This woman, while attending to eyebrow- and armpit-plucking, would also like to be one of those females who appears on PBS without any self-conscienceness about post-Victorian grooming "trends."

She wants to live with birds and monkeys / apes and with moths and such that are mysteries.

She doesn't believe in homo sapiens as a thing to explore as-is.

I hear more people screaming.

This one has a female voice.

(No, this is not a metaphor.)

Water sign suffering


When the autumn air turns arid, no amount of usual hydration will do. The people I know who live in California eschew the Midwestern humidity, but I find every year that my skin is suited to it. Those strange nose sores, the violently itchy skin, chapped lips, and the fact that days can go by and one's hair is still "clean" I would trade for mid-tropical today.

I met a bunch of neighbors yesterday; they have this annual block party thing. I can't really comment, because who knows who may stumble by — my neighbors work for DeVry, for Hallmark, for the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum; some of them are adamant about restricting street parking to residents via annual permits (and signs the city / your taxes will pay for).

I understand the frustration of not being able to park near one's home when one takes the privilege to use fuel and come home for lunch, or when one works a night shift and finds the whole street full of students' cars … but 24/7 seems silly, and I don't quite buy the fact (he could not produce evidence or paperwork, just petitions — "ah, those are at home") that the civic body elected can't work out some other method. Wanna visit me? Oh, sorry, you have to have $2 permit. More details, please. Yes, I know Parking Control doesn't come around at night — so, again, why would the rules be applicable then?

The more interesting part is how people talked about each other to us, the newest ones, saying things to forge allies, to plant suspicion, to goad, to invite, to inform. There is a book club, apparently, too. I have a feeling I probably said some things that were not appropriate. But I'm always too honest, even when on guard.

I just got this vibe, except from my two closest neighbors (the two sets with little kids, the neighbors whose yard is adjacent, the neighbors whose yard I can see from our porch), that there is tension, that there is discord, that, like certain people one works with, one shouldn't become friends, that it's not going to work out, that it's always going to be based on something besides love.

As for those I do love, I have neglected to carve out the hours it takes to make phone calls, to write letters, to visit.

I'm sorry.

We did refinance the house last week. I guess the neighbors can hear that. Lost over a point of interest and $100 a month in payment. With the appraisal, it cost a few hundred less than the October payment would have been. Don't have to pay again until December, which is uniquely fitting to my personal cash-flow issues. I looked into and have half-completed applying to the IRS for its seasonal positions. You in Missouri and nearby have noticed that your federal return envelope says Kansas City. The processing center, build LEED® Silver, is nearby but not actually employing until February 7.

I have a midterm on Wednesday, and I have the usual, the same pile of work to do for my employment job. I'm angry because the last production has at least three errors — one is mine (a spacing typo), one is the printer's (a post-proof change that apparently was not made clear), one is designer's (typing things in that already exist and are triple-checked and should be cut-and-pasted in).

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Strangers

Jean-Marie Gustave Le Clezio

Yes, well, I knew it would be someone I had never heard of, much less read. For all I know, the books are in still in French. The idea that his work has something to do with "sensual ecstasy" is intriguing. Of course, considering one of his cited works was published in 1980 … yes, of course, they are translated.

Gosh, I'm fairly stupid.

PS — I have books by the 2007 winner on my shelf. Me and Doris Lessing have a long but shallow relationship, however.

Can anyone guess the Peace Prize winner?

What should be really darn funny is who they pick for the economics prize (announcing Monday) — you know, since the world is doing so well on that topic (and I'm getting alarmist and depressing mail from 9-11 dentist about how the banking crisis is contrived, unConstitutional, based in a 100-year-old mess involving the original banker-types like Rockefeller, and related to charming items such as martial law and the CIA, etc. Some of it does stand up to evidence … who is in charge of what companies and how they are all related. Yes, of course, it makes sense that rich and powerful people are related. Family is family. Anyone want to check on the Frank George Wisner III / Enron / AIG / CIA one? How about Lehman Bros. / Bush family / campaign contributions to both McCain & Obama? Bottom line is that Americans are fairly stupid overall, of course.)

Shall I turn my entire yard into a field of St. John's Wort?

I feel like I haven't had a seratonin-moment since, well, let's just say that even the parakeet factor is no longer valid.

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Junket


What a fun word.

Reading the financial news is boring, but I've found that switching to science provides a few lights:

Nobel Prize in chemistry to trio of men who invented glowing proteins

Man who came through (a vastly expensive — they never mention how these things are paid for) double-arm transplant

Stem cells for men in a most accessible place

Plants that tell Prozac to go to hell

Bunches of "new" sea creatures and mountains

The NP for literature will be announced tomorrow. Dear nerd friends: Anyone got any picks?

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Math

Have you heard the one about how "if we split up the $700 billion, everyone would get $400,000" (or $40,000, or whatever)?

It made me optimistic for about 10 seconds, until fact-checker me did the math.

Counting kids and the undocumented, we'd all get about $2,000, folks. If it were divided per household, each of those would see about six grand.

Now, $1.3 trillion? That's walking around money! Welcome to the United States of the Federal Reserve. (Not really; it's still not enough to pay anything off in this household.)

On another note, I read that the Springfield, Missouri, School District is set to become larger than ours. It got me thinking about my "investment" in education (being a property owner and all).

If $300 million is the Kansas City, Missouri, School District's annual budget, and there are about 21,000 kids in that system, why doesn't $14,000 per student add up to anything like adults who can use a calculator to divide 700,000,000,000 by 305,000,000 before spreading around misinformation? Or better yet, people who can estimate that in their heads and spew out a retort posthaste.

Can you tell I've been reading founding-father-era fodder?

Monday, October 06, 2008

Well, duh

"Investors are realizing that the Bush administration's $700 billion rescue plan won't work quickly to unfreeze credit markets, and many banks are still having difficulty gaining access to cash. European governments also took steps over the weekend to limit the damage from the growing global financial crisis."

Dear Congress,
I wanted to thank you once again for not listening.

All my love,
Registered sucker.

PS, to all you non-Congressites out there: If you live in Missouri, you have two more days to register to vote, change your address, and get right with the system. Even though there is Diebold and Florida and all … wouldn't it be amazing if the country that invented modern democracy (and then set about dismantling elements of it) had the kind of turnout that they get in Iraq and Africa?

Go to 1828 Walnut, kceb.org or to the library or grocery store, where the cheerful volunteers are daily with their clipboards.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Spread it

Yeah, I'm going to be a politi-dork and tell you that I sent a fax to "my Congressman." The D.C. servers are all down — hmm, wonder why? They haven't ever expected "us" to be involved to this extent. Funny.

If you have access to a fax and you live in KCMO, tell Emanuel Cleaver how you feel: 202-225-4403.

He is one of the Dems who switched from "no" to "yes" after "sweeteners" like tax breaks for natural disaster victims (great precedent, eh?), money for rural schools (again, what does this have to do with banks taking risks they are not able to sustain?), and even rum, I read, were added.

I do not see how my government's buying risky assets is a good thing, especially when the idea is to "create a market for risky debt again."

See any safeguards? Regulation? Sure, just print more money and cause inflation. That helps consumers.

Who owns America? In case you had forgotten, they are making a huge transparent show of it.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

No photos

Not because I went to a copyright seminar last night, no, but because I don't have any new ones that say what I want to say visually.

No fun for you, no fun for me.

Sunny, well-fed (for me), sort-of rested (for me), solvent (for me), fine.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Oh, there's a great idea:

Chewing tobacco for the Marines that has "energy drink" elements and caffeine added.

I guess the next time I just can't wait to puke, I'll go get me some of that.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Early morning

Just a thought, based on my age and experience: how awesome can the financial bailout package be (and how do I know my Congresspeople have read it), when they were up all Saturday night?

Tomorrow morning, I shall share how well my own work came out after a similar work timeframe.

I calculated it will take 8.5 hours of Sunday to accomplish my overdue goals.

I'm not including all the hours I've already spent collecting and verifying information.

And two major writing projects are still ahead. Only 1,000 and 1,000 words really, but being concise is more difficult than verbosity. So no one knows how many hours remain. And I'll have to eat at some point. And then I'll get tired. And clear thought will cease. But I won't know it until later when I re-read.

I've put in 2.5 hours so far. No, blogging doesn't count. But I had to take a shower and everything, so it's already almost 1 in the afternoon. Six more to go!

Friday, September 26, 2008

More Balefulness

The credit card company that my dad hates the most crumbled under its bad mortgage portfolios.

This would be Providian, which became Washington Mutual, or WaMu, which is now owned by big-ass JPMorgan Chase & Co. (thanks to a step-in by FDIC yesterday). Just a couple of billion dollars between friends…

I wonder if they will erase my debt? Ha ha.

Dad scorns them for being the company notorious for jacking up interest rates randomly on customers (such as him, not me).

Which was legal, you know.

Which says something.

Didn't Mr. Morgan also enjoy rampant speculation and such?

Robber barons, anyone? They still have that in the history textbooks?

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

2.5

It was three-thirty, two and a half hours ago. I don't know why I woke up. I don't know why I couldn't sleep again.

Then, suddenly, it was already five.

Cue helicopters.

T'is the season. Every morning at five. Over and over.

Then some trains. Hooooorn. Deep bass wheels carrying carrying carrying.

Now, of course, it's raining. Some people find that a restful sound.

Thunder, though, has always kept me up.

Besides, I have a ton of work to do.

Thanks to my foresight, I did not turn off the Air Port last night after my silliness (bad day, was it?), and so my battery here is only at 26%, which does not leave much time. (Is that a too-compounded sentence?) We'll likely have intermittent Internet access, too. Can't plug in during thunderstorms.

Hmm, I wonder if there is some kind of bailout available?

I can't tell if rain is a good or bad backdrop for an appraisal. Bad lighting is not good for interiors. However, it can mask exterior flaws, right? Someone look up how long it is going to rain. I don't think 5.5, do you?

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

So


The last post made me look all socialist-anarchist and poor and angry and such.

Pshaw.

Oh, and perhaps like an alcoholic, or at least someone who has rigid expectations about certain planned recreational moments.  I can't stand when little things are thwarted.

It's the kind of disposition that gets very lost upon learning, always at the last moment — don't think that I look up and then iCal-schedule the television programming guide in advance; who has time for that? — to discover that The Simpsons is delayed by football or that Futurama is cancelled.

(The latter I learned beforehand from a researching friend. I heard from another that King of the Hill is next. It's like my camping / float trip "curse;" it always rains.  Baseball games, too, though only almost always. And the last family reunion in 18 years or something.  But every show I really like doesn't last.  Greg the Bunny.  North Shore.  Arrested Development.  Note to you:  don't market to my demographic because its buying power is way weak and we can't keep anything that's not on cable afloat.  I kind-of wonder why Boston Legal is still on.  Of course, try to track the showing times of that program, and you will find they're random and require an RSS or Twitter feed to alert fans who care.  I know about the program downloads.  I can't watch TV on a computer and off the expected time.  Therein lies my loyalty.  It all makes sense now.)

Still, I like things, certain, inconsequential and utterly benign and non-addictive things to remain predictable.

"Things fall apart, the centre cannot hold?"

I think after 88 years and my many moments with it that there is no copyright on The Second Coming by Mr. Yeats anymore. No matter he was being specific, about a place and time, much like certain evangelists had to work with; the point is that it's still relevant, is "timeless" and has the power to move (plus it's in our own language, always an advantage when reading poetry):


Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

**********
addicted-to-AP and contemp. rules must say that oh, i would have to edit it to "toward." english, you are tedious.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Pawning to the populace

Do you think the $700 billion bailout (implying a leaky, sinking ship) will trickle down to help me any?

All I need is $700 to pay my school bill; slow, distracted, somewhat sinking I did not conceive of using buckets this semester until recently; I learned finally that it is too late to de-roll. Their interest rate is low, at least. But now I have to pay them, and I have to continue (o.k., how about resume) going to class.

They really do not give one much time to decide anything — four days, in fact, after classes begin; after that, one has a few more days to go from the 100% to 60% refund mark. I didn't even have my textbooks until two weeks ago. The bookstore blamed a teacher; the other teacher blamed the publishers. Both cases seemed correct and had the same outcome: lack of study materials, wrecked syllabi, and a demotivated student.

Momentum is important!

I wish I could be happy that We the People own some huge financial companies, just as we own those great oil fields, sequoia trees, Grand Canyon, mines, timber. Some, of course, actually belong to other countries, Native American nations.

Speaking of them, here's some endorsement interest from the Santa Fe New Mexican paper:

The All Indian Pueblo Council, the Mescalero Apache Tribe and the leader of the Navajo Nation have thrown their support behind Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama. Obama's campaign says the endorsements represent a majority of New Mexico's Indian leadership. The council represents 19 pueblos, and the Navajo Nation spans parts of New Mexico, Arizona and Utah. Navajo President Joe Shirley Jr. says Indian Country has lived with federal policies for the last eight years that have eroded tribal culture and language. He says it's time for the federal government to honor its obligations to its native people. Obama, in a statement issued Friday, said tribes face a special set of challenges, and he looks forward to working will all tribal leaders.

I spent 90 minutes pulling out about 125 cubic feet of random grass, evil fake trees, the four-foot walnut tree (third time in a year; it is very tenacious), and the plant I refer to as Satan's marigold. The back yard looks improved to me. I don't know what it looks like to anyone else.

I uncovered the basil, still doing fairly well for being neglected amid wildflowers and a sprawling hollyhock. Ergo, pesto, and the spinach pesto lasagna, eventually. Finally finished.

That meant driving to the store. Shopping at the store. Curse the weak dollar for making Irish whiskey $25. Ergo, no chance of St. Monday tomorrow. (ie: did not buy; still spent $50 or so, of course)

Car insurance's $800 is due in a couple of weeks. Doh!

I also need a dose of Hang on, Voltaire's knack for chopping up tasks into accomplishable pieces. I am stymied by the concurrence of equally-important and weighty and time-consuming items to produce. Let's use ergo again: yes, so the result is that barely anything has happened. Summing up three: a paragraph out of 14; a pasted-in chunk of text; a half-hearted disappointed editing of 2,400 words that need to be far fewer.

Many, many hours have already been invested. I need a bailout!

The fact that I can't anticipate how long certain things take — it's mostly contingent on the availability of information, a fishing game that is as difficult to predict as tossing baited lines into a lake — adds to panic, freezing action.

Then certain things happen like sunset or the weekend and I can't see stapling my mind to something less rewarding than enjoyment.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

I like

— how giant companies can get so giant that their survival becomes essential to everyone else's, as if AIG is the water of the financial world. Indeed, who ever thought that the charging Merrill bull would grow feeble and go out to pasture?

— how anyone can hack a Yahoo account.

— how Japanese people all want to wear Sarah Palin glasses. Trend on, Nihon-jin.

— how I'm the only person at the office.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Hungry

Cold.  Laundry.  Books.  Work. 

Infection abating.

Roof still problematic.

Weather and economy discouraging.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Too much to do

This does not include your laundry, grocery shopping, letters / calls to parents, childcare, reading, bath-time, or any other human fun.  It doesn't even include the opera, ballet, theatre, or other intellectual stimuli. Still, I know which places have free beer, free wine, and free food.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Prescription Bactroban cream discovered in cabinet

Federal law violation in progress.

Tar putty declared successful

Porch slated for moisture-damage recovery despite steady rains.

Patriot

That's me.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Squirrel tail

Thank you, neighborhood cat, for leaving a fuzzy spine-end with fly-enticements still attached on the sidewalk in the back yard.  Charmed, I'm sure.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

oven bunny


idioms are odd and change with time.

(image: detail from work by Matthias Potter, currently on display at.)

Monday, September 08, 2008

11 years ago

This was what was (punctuation amended):

Let a piece of peace
Fall on me, please,
I need something like quiet.

In my life of loud and go
I need quiet.

I left my soul on the banks of a
River I was dreaming of —
It's a false notion that we
Carry our souls around in our bodies.

I don't know about you, but mine's
Waiting on me.
Somewhere else.
Where she can be thinking.
I hope she's thinking of me.

Maybe she'll have it all worked out
By the time I get back.
But I think she'd rather have me there in the meantime
Where it's quiet.

We can sit on the grass and
Talk about all our pasts and
How this life seems to be going.
We can drink when we're thirsty,
Sleep when we get weary.
There'll be no airplanes scraping overhead,
No cars cutting up the air,
And no concrete full of tedious reverberation.

I'll stroke her hair; she'll maybe massage my feet.
We'll be merely being,
But, oh, how full of life we'll be.

Let a piece of peace
Fall on me, please.
I need something like quiet.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Weekend ha ha

It's funny to hear a friend say with correct righteousness that I should be able to stick around a while on a Sunday afternoon, after we've been camping together (with 10 others) since Saturday afternoon (Saturday morning, if you count the driving that started at 7:30), to simply enjoy being.

Yes, well, tell that to my work e-mail account and its 20 new messages.

Count in Friday's 5 to 10 p.m. (of which I can say, I guess, that 70 percent was non-personal time), and you have me, the spacey disaster who had admitted trouble stringing sentences together until this morning.

I slept for almost eight real hours last night, a kind of miracle, but by this point, 8.5 hours later, I'm about ready to keel over.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

First Friday


In Kansas City, Missouri's Crossroads art district on September 5, there is too much to do and see. However, my recommendation is to hit the Leedy-Voulkos Art Center, 2012 Baltimore St., around 7 p.m. and see work not-so-Crossroady.

For a pretty-darn-complete list of what else is opening, check Review's calendar.

Better not cut that pie

Ah, the random quoting of what is on the iTunes.

Courtesy of Ani DiFranco, whom I'm not going to be able to see when she swings through town (actually, she hates KC, she always hits the college towns of Lawrence, Kansas, and Columbia, Missouri — as if all her "real fans" weren't her own damn age and out of college!) but not because of geographic resentment, though, yes, I hate driving home in the middle of the night after a show, but because I can't spare the $30 for something I said I'd never go to again. I think I just need to go by myself, but then I'd be the weird married woman all alone and suspect of all the younger lesbians. Just kidding. Just spewing. Just too busy and too fried and too tired and too overwhelmed.

Science chases money and money chases its tail, and the best minds of my generation can't make bail …

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Summary

Who's Cuter

Me (in 10 years) or Sarah?

Moo

Samuel A. Maverick, d. 1870: American pioneer who did not brand his calves.

Maybe they do cling to religion there

Ooh, it's Mr. NYC

"Hi, I was in on it."

Just kidding; not a real quote.

(Cindy's wearing the pearls again. If those are real, wow.)

"A proud soldier in the Reagan" something something.

What's wrong with an Ivy leaguer who was a community organizer? A military guy is better somehow.

Chicago machine politics. Obama as mafia. Hmm. Sounds like Truman. Darn those Democrats.

Yes, I think he has problems with the non-voting. What is up with that?

Voting "present" is a kind of protest, Mr. 9-11 baseball hat. Yes, making decisions is important. But so is saying, like my Republican brother, "this is crap, and I'm not voting for either of them."

Oooh, "the kind of thing that can only happen in the United States."

Never had to run a business, military leader, etc.

Doesn't that describe our current man? Failed at how many business posts. Didn't go to any war. Skipped the heck out. Screwed up at the Ivy league school! If we can elect someone with a proven track record of failure, what's wrong with electing one that is sweet, young, appears to be honest, and is cute — what's wrong with you, fellow women voters?

Oh, wait, Rudy, you didn't just use the flip-flop card. McCain has changed his silly mind about tax cuts, drilling, etc. Bleh!

"Anything that terrorists do to us … this man is tested … our children … our country will be safe in the hands of John McCain …"

I feel better already, don't you?

I am afraid of "hope as a strategy." Of course I am. But I'm more afraid of a hawkish guy who has the same leadership experience as the other guy. Remember when they said that senators never get elected? I am waiting for the wild card.

"… and YES, off-shore oil drilling."

He's making a joke about "drill, baby, drill." That's what they're chanting now.

Chuckabee

"Americans don't want more government, they want less." No, I want a smarter one, and I'm not afraid of "European ideas."

Jesus, Elvis, and FDR are his heroes, per his Hope, Arkansas, hometown's.

Who are mine, you ask? Oh, you know.

"I don't want to spend the rest of my life poor, waiting for the government to rescue me." Neither do I. I want the government to have policy based on intelligence, is all. We all just disagree about intelligence.

He's tired of hearing about Palin's lack of experience. (Isn't that the issue with "all" the candidates?)

His citation of the teacher's strategy seems on point. Would that all teachers acted such. One should earn things. I can't wait for the punch line … here it comes: oh, the veterans. Yes, kids should respect that. Mr. Mike should see how many of the low-income school kids cling to the JROTC and even aspire to join the military, even the illegitimate non-citizens. (This is first-person writer speaking again; seven years talking to kids at a certain school.) Sigh.

Drill now — drill, baby, drill!

Tell me I didn't just hear a man say that on TV. I'm not watching comedy, right?

Who is this "I'm an African American, too, and we don't need someone who clamors for applause, but who puts our country first?" You can look it up as well as I can. (He's head of GOPAC.)

I will say that the RNC crowd's periodic repeated chanting of the country's initials is more "socialist"-seeming than the nice, genuine-ish enthusiasm I observed at the DNC.

Watch out, they're energized.

I am pissed that liberal media is showing its stripes. Wasn't the DNC on all the major networks? I can only see the RNC on PBS — why?

Here's Mitt Romney calling us to watch for sunrise in the west (Arizona, Alaska). I love it when they get all scientific.

He's telling me that our Supreme Court is liberal because it gave "Guantanamo terrorists Constitutional rights." Are those the ones who were citizens of my country already? You tell me.

And government spending has doubled since 1980. Umm, well, yes, we bought a war, right?

O.k. I won't go on. I had plenty of snarky comments against DNC speakers, too, you just didn't get to see them.

Wait, "It's time for the party of big ideas, not Big Brother." (Which party is that, again?)

Oh, yes, he just pulled the Ronald Reagan card. Good move.

"Immediate" drilling for more oil off our shores (again). (It's not gonna be immediate, no matter who approves what when; the immediate part is that fuel-chain investors will see a rise. Even Sarah Palin admitted that.)

"Republicans believe there is good and evil in the world." (I do, too.) He then invokes McCain: "Radical violent Islam is evil and he will defeat it." (Now who's the Messiah?)

Chant with me and them USA USA USA USA USA USA …

"Never been a day when I was not proud to be an American."

Sorry, buddy, send me to the beach and throw away the key, because I ain't no absolutist. How can you not be ashamed of anything at all?

"… providence of the Almighty …"

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Class action

One feels so very proletarian when one finds unexpected settlement letters in the mail. One thing electronic communication hasn't been able to replace are personal legal notices. Yes, certain ones can be published in a "daily record" sort of thing, and even those have been proposed (perhaps won and done) to be moved to Web sites; it's cheaper for the counties, a missed market for the "dead tree media."

"You're being served" just isn't the same if it's an Evite.

Settlements from class action lawsuits are not entirely unexpected. There is always a preliminary letter from the attorneys. Clishé: they seem to be the real winners, the ones who actually receive non-negligible chunks of the millions — we pay them a lot to prove a point / to record that a company admits wrongdoing. The letter gives you the option to sign away your rights to the suit. I do not know the expediency of doing that.

The first such suit I happened to be classed with was the case brought against the University of Missouri. Someone proved that the way the state law or the school's charter was written, tuition could not be charged. Yes, now they simply charge "educational fees," or perhaps they have changed the law. I can't recall, and I'm not going to look it up — this is first-hand testimony from a slightly respected (and never intentionally misleading / almost always accurate / always admitting known mistakes) writer.

I never was able to realize those benefits, as the settlement only paid out in $500 increments to students from a certain era (we were there in the '90s) and who were enrolling in the public Missouri universities again. One could extend the benefit to family, but one also had to apply for the money as for any other scholarship.

Apparently, they have already run through the $50 million or whatever. I checked when I got back into grad school last semester. It didn't take long, did it? It was gone long before the statue of limitations.

Presently, I'm now "due" $3.50 for every month I was self-insured through a particular organization, between 1997 and April 8, 2008. I don't know what the suit is about. It's unclear, but I have a good 42 months in.

Wow, the meaning of life, the universe and everything is my health insurance.

Yes, that same company is telling me again at annual-renewal-point-October: "We periodically review the trends in escalating health-care costs, the increasing use of medical services, and other factors. In doing so, we have determined that we will need to adjust your health insurance premium rate."

So meaningful!

Never mind that I haven't cost them a dime in years. The woman is rarely ill. She has fine cholesterol and LDL levels, fine BP, and likely will die of cancer or heart disease, according to family history. But whatever … just one, very old "pre-existing condition," whose origin is unknown and untraceable and whose outcome is "gone for nearly a decade," so take a hike, premium-metrics — it's not the kind of thing that comes back or will ever cost anything in any way!

[You know how they ask you when you sign up whether you smoke — and it's a big deal? What if you start later and never mention it or go to the doc? I'm not self-reporting! I do not smoke or use other tobacco products. I eat broccoli, so bug off.]

Anyway, the 147 bucks that is my "settlement" is pretty much my new monthly rate, up from $123 only six months ago (it seems. She's too lazy to retrieve checking records right now. Even so, if it's every year and all I've done personally is age, well, do some percentage-of-increase math and tell me how things will be when I'm menopausal in __ years.)

But wait, there's more! The maximum settlement is just $21!

Great, let me go buy a bottle of whiskey and call it good.

My current deductible is $2,500 individual, but "co-insurance" is 80% of 10 grand. Max annual out-of-pocket (like there's anything IN the pocket) is $4,500. Yup, that's more than I could bear right now. Shiny, happy, Visa card …

Forgot to mention: I have no co-pay: I pay the WHOLE doctor visit bill (which they run through the game system and adjust depending on what insurance one has).

OH, and the best part is that, should I wish to reduce my premium, my only "options" now are to take on something that has a $5,000 annual deductible across the board, with an annual max payout of $7,000.

(May I curse now?)

All I want is new contacts. Vision is not covered in this plan. I bet I could guess what my prescription should be. Would that one could just order online and be done with it. Yes, yes, doctors are important, and I'm not looking to put anyone out of business, but my issue is merely computers, no diagnosis required. Only this and nothing more.

And Lenore is quite weary of hearing of Annabel Lee.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Still

Note to self: don't go out.
Note to other self: don't stay in.
Note to self: you are bad with boundaries.
Note to other self: avoiding everything outright is not a solution.
Note to self: just say no.
Note to other self: you never say yes.

Note to body: please stay asleep longer.
Note to body: nice suntan lines to end the summer.
Note to body: you are 34.

Note to universe: send advice.

Deuteronomy 5:17-21

From the Writing on the Wall series,
Duty:

Faced with the obvious damn thing that you're determined not to do?

Well, thank God and no one else that thinking about it is not as bad as doing it.

Because the underlying truth is that it inevitably will cross your mind. We're not held as accountable for that spontaneous feral experience of odd-placed joy as for our following through with the unexpected (somewhat expected) impulse. Newland Archer understood the folly of justifying one's own situation as the exception to the rule.

Stepping outside and viewing in, it is evident there is only one path.

I am good. I keep my promises. I don't break commandments except 1 through 3. Yes, hell-bound but not for having transgressed against my neighbor. If I stretch it, I can say the reason for my respecting fellow humans is my respect for commandments 1 through 3. Just not in the way He meant it.

________________, however, so I'm apparently lying about quashing fellow humans with whom I have no standing commitments.

That involved yet another man. And the other one altogether, who played the accompanying friend, was half in love with me but like all my best loves respected that I was not free.

How is it possible that there is any arguing whether "thou shall not murder" includes such a grotesque and oft-necessary procedure? Another case of the obvious. Grim, heartbreaking, and dumped into the internal pile of equivalent regrets — all the past loves, which are always Current Love Singular — because I choose to think of all time concurrently.

Yes, it's all choices.
We do a lot of stupid things all the time.
We just have more hope than sense.

I haven't made the same mistake twice.